The Compassion of the Prophet

1. The Prophet’s loyalty to his family:
The Prophet commanded Muslims to approach their wives if they see a woman who stimulates their sexual desire, in order to relieve themselves from this desire in a lawful manner. By doing this a Muslim would safeguard himself from falling into evil, and would rid himself of the whispering of Satan. Jabir bin Abdullah said: “The Messenger of Allah saw a woman that appealed to him, and he went to the house of Zainab and after coming out said: “A woman would be beautified in the eyes of man by Satan. If one of you sees a woman that appeals to him, let him then go to his family and release that tension with his family.” (Tirmidthi #1158)
2. The Prophet’s desire to see his family:
One shouldn’t spend too much time away from his family; if they happen to travel, they should try their best to come back as quickly as possible. The Prophet said: “Indeed travelling is a tormenting experience; it would prevent one from enjoying their share of sleep, food and drink. If one of you finishes their duties, let them rush back home.” (Bukhari #3001)
3. Maintaining ties of compassion between husband and wife:
Giving a gift is indeed a sign of love and companionship. The Prophet said: “Give gifts, for indeed it removes hard-feelings from the hearts.” (Tirmidthi #2130)
For love to be well-rooted in a family giving a gift upon returning from a trip is important. It has been narrated: “If one of you travels on a trip, let him return with a gift for his family.” (Ibn Hibban #1/316)
4. The Prophet would pay attention to his family:
Being attentive to your family’s needs and taking care of them are signs of a responsible spouse. Satan is always on the watch to harm a person and pull them away from what is ethical. The Prophet said: “The eyes fornicate and their fornication is looking at prohibited things. The ears fornicate and their fornication is listening to prohibited things. The tongue fornicates and its fornication is speaking to women strangers. The hand fornicates and its fornication is to touch unlawful things. The feet fornicate and their fornication is walking to the prohibited. The heart wishes and desires; thereafter, one may actually fornicate or come close to doing it.” (Muslim #2657)
The Prophet left an amazing example in relation to this. A’ishah said: “When believing women migrated and gave the Pledge of Allegiance to the Prophet he accepted the Pledge by word of mouth. The hands of the Prophet never touched the hand of any woman.” (Ibn Majah #2342)
5. The Prophet trusted his family:
Any individual who achieves success in life, or reaches a position of power would be envied and quite naturally he would have enemies. When the hypocrites spread the false news of the story of ‘Ifk’, in which they accused A’ishah of being unfaithful, the Prophet said: "O Muslims! Who will relieve me from that man who has hurt me with his evil statement about my family? By Allah, I know nothing except good about my family!” (Bukhari #4750)
6. The Prophet openly professed his love for his family:
Khadijah had an unforgettable role in the life of the Prophet. He continued to remember and honor her till the day he died.' A'ishah said, "I did not feel as jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of Khadijah because the Prophet used to mention her very often." (Muslim #2435)
The Prophet also said concerning Khadijah, "Allah blessed me with her love." And he said, "I love everyone she loved." A’ishah once said: “Hasn’t Allah given you someone better than her?” The Prophet replied: “No, by Allah, Allah has not given me a better one in her place. She believed me when people belied me. She consoled me with her money when people deprived me, and from her alone I had children.” (Bukhari #1575)
7. The Prophet appeared clean when he met his family:
A Muslim is ordered to be of high ethical, moral character as well to be hygienic in all his affairs. The Prophet said: “If one of you has sexual relations with his wife and afterwards wanted to return, let them perform the wudhu.” (Muslim)
When asked about this, he said: “It is purer, better and more hygienic.” (Abu Dawood #219)
8. The Prophet was considerate:
Family intimacy is between two individuals, the husband and wife. The Prophet forbade that one approach his family while they are not ready. Imam Ibn Qudamah, may Allah have mercy on him, the Hanbali Jurist, mentioned that the Messenger of Allah said: “Do not begin intercourse until she has experienced desire, like the desire you experience, lest you fulfill your desire before she does.” (Mughni 8:136)
The Prophet also forbade that one leave his wife after intercourse while she has not had her orgasm.
9. The Prophet’s passion towards his wives:
True love is something that transcends all boundaries. It is displayed regardless of the situation one may be in, it doesn’t fluctuate. This is a lesson we learn from the life of our beloved Prophet. Urwa, may Allah have mercy on him, said: “A man asked me: ‘Can a woman in menses serve me?’ I replied: A’isha told me that she used to comb the Prophet’s hair while she was in her menses, and he was in Itikaf (i.e. staying in the mosque). He would bring his head near her in her room and she would comb his hair, while she was in her menses.’” (Bukhari #2030)
10. Never spread bedroom secrets:
It is forbidden for both husband and wife to spread any ‘bedroom secrets’. The Prophet said: “Verily among the worst people before Allah on the Day of Resurrection is a man who approaches his wife sexually and he spreads her secrets.” (Muslim #1437)

Asma bint Yazid said that she heard the Prophet saying: “Perhaps a man might discuss what he does with his wife (with others) or perhaps a woman might inform someone what she did with her husband?” The people were silent. I said: “Yes! O Messenger of Allah verily both women and men do that!" The Prophet said: “Do not do that. It is similar to two devils who meet each other on a path and they have sex while people look on.” (Irwa al-Ghalil 7/73)
11. The Prophet would pamper his wives:
The Prophet would call A’ishah ‘A’ish’ (a nickname for Aisha). One day the Prophet addressed her saying: “This is Angel Gabriel conveying his greetings to you.” A’ishah said: “May peace and blessings be upon him; O Messenger of Allah you can see what I can't see.” (Bukhari #6201)

The Prophet would also call A’ishah “al-Humaira” (i.e. white-skinned woman with blushed cheeks). (Silsilah #3277)
12. The Prophet would take rest under the same sheet with his wife:
The Prophet would take rest with his family even while they were in their menstrual period. The Prophet would sit with his wife, eat with her, drink with her, and show affectionate feelings towards her.

A’ishah said: “The Prophet performed night prayers while standing close to me and I was in my menstrual period. At times, I would have a sheet over myself and a portion of that sheet would also be on the Prophet. (Muslim #514)
A’ishah also said: “The Prophet was resting on my lap while I was in my menstrual period and he was reciting the Quran.” (Bukhari #297)
13. The Prophet would bathe with his wife:
The Prophet was always keen to make his family feel happy in all situations. The Prophet would bathe with his wife as A’ishah said: “I was bathing with the Messenger of Allah and we were using one water utensil, he would rush to use the water before I could and I would say: “leave some for me, leave some for me!” (Nasa’ee #412)
14. The Prophet would kiss his wife:
Compliment your spouse often with kisses. When exiting the house, make it a habit that you kiss your wife. When you return home greet your wife and kiss her as well, to show her that you missed her dearly.

Physical interactions in a marriage are very important. The famous saying is, “actions speak louder than words.” Show your spouse that you love her. A successful relationship depends upon the ‘little things’ we do for they play a big role in the success of a relationship. A’ishah said: “One day the Messenger of Allah wanted to kiss me, and I told him: ‘I am fasting!’ He responded: ‘I am fasting as well!’ and he kissed me in spite of that.” (Silsilah #4139)

The Prophet’s Social Side with His Family

The Prophet was very gentle towards his family. The Prophet instructed us saying: “Gentleness is not used to complete something except that it would be embellished.” The Prophet said to A’ishah: “O A’ishah, when Allah wants good for a household, its members would treat each other kindly.” (Targhib #2669)